Camping Tips & Rumors

Since i hav been away camping this past week, i think i owe it 2 u all 2 giv u lots of thorough camping tips. i hav been looking around and hearing lots of rumors about camping so i also think i owe it 2 u 2 giv my all on those rumors. anyway, pleez enjoy.

Q: R bugs there really bad?
A: Yes. But, if u want 2 help control them, then b sure 2 use Bug Spray. Also, they r attracted 2 bright clothing so try not do wear mind-boggling yellow on a camping trip if u can help it.

Q: I heard that bugs r attracted 2 pretty scents like shampoos and soaps used on yourself. Should i not shower anymore?
A: NO! Still shower! if u don't shower on a camping trip then you're GROSS!

Q: AHHH! I GOT BITTEN BY A SNAKE!
A: Girl, what HAV u been doing? Well, first off, go get an adult. If u can't do that, then inspect the wound. If it's like it almost an oval shape with two layers of teeth, then it's probably not poisonous. If you can see the two fang marks in the wound, and there's only 1 layer of teeth then odds r that it IS poisonous. Just stay calm, go get help, and whatever u do- DON'T do the old "sucking out the poison ont he wound and spitting it out" thing that u c in movies. That doesn't work.

Q: Every1 tells me i should go everywhere w/ a buddy, and i'm sick of it! it's getting 2 b a pain!
A: too bad. still do it.

Q: I'm lost in the woods all alone!
A: stay calm and don't go anywhere. Unless they're morons, the rest of the group or some1 will realize ur gone and come searching 4 u. just stay where u r and hum some campfire songs 2 pass time.

Q: HELP! IM GOING 2 HAV 2 EAT SPAM!
A: flee 2 the nearest toilet and pretend 2 b sick.

Q: Seriously?
A: No, of course not! that wuz a joke.

Q: Oh. Then what do i do?
A: there ain't nothing u can do. it's 1 of life's tragedies. live with it.

there r way more camping tips i could giv, but im not. too bad. im lazy. get ovr it. so, instead, go occupy urself w/ a ham and cheese sandwich or something. bye.