What I Like

I like it when the smartest kid in the class gets a question wrong. (Unless it's me.)

I like it when my science teacher gives a piece of information nobody cares about (did you know that a woodpecker can peck twenty times a second?) and everyone just looks at him as if to say "No."

I like it when preppy girls wear flipflops in the dead of winter and steps in a pile of cold snow.

I like it when my brothers are playing Yu-Gi-Oh, and I have no idea what they're saying. (Activating force-flex character proton X Shield of the Goblin raiders on the second Beast of the Cave magic card!)

I like it when a comedy show tells a bad joke, and to make up for the silence they digitally add some old record of people laughing even though they all know it's lame.

I like it when some kids start to talk about how much they hate their math teacher, when they find out she's right behind them.

I like it when those lame characters in that lame cartoon always say "this can't get any worse!" and it magically just gets worse.

I like it when people wear their pants way too high.

I like it when little kindergarten boys would point at little kindergarten girls and yell "EW! COOTIES!" and the girls would automatically look all over themselves and wonder what's wrong.

I like it when fatty cupcakes, etc. would have a big label on the side that says "reduced sugar!" as if that changed anything.

I like it when you're talking to a boy, and his voice breaks.

I like it when parents who read way to many parenting books, try to persuade their children to eat "cod oil" pills, saying that it will help "nuture the mind."

I like it when a child back-sasses their parent in front of guests, and the parent completely flips out with embarrasment.

I like it when I give a friend some candy that I think is really delicious, and their faces screw up as they try to resist the urge to spit it out.

I like it when the underpaid guy dressed up as Santa in Macy's around Christmas, trys to hurry the kids along, only to find out they have a whole speech planned out.

I like it when people dye their hair some absurd color for no reason.

I like it when, for whatever reason, you're up at a ridiculous hour, and you see people jogging outside.

I like it when you'reout at a party eating some sort of rich dessert, and the weight-watcher moms are all eyeing you venomously.

I like it when your Grandma, Aunt, etc. is watching you open their present they gave you- thinking that you'll love it- only for you to find it's something completely gross or hideous and your parents break out in a sweat behind your Grandma's back.

I like it when you go to another country, and somehow, without even hearing your accent, they'll all somehow know you're American.

I like it when you go to the beach, and there's the usual chicks in bikinis and surfers in hawaian shorts, but just when you think it's going to be completely normal, you see this really really old man in a tiny bathing suit, just trying to fit in.

I like it when you're watching a play, and in a particularily quiet scene, a baby starts bawling for no apparent reason.

I like it when a child is holding a popcicle on a really hot day, and tries to lick up all the drips at once, but ends up dropping the popcicle and buying a new one.

I like it when you're in a zoo's bathroom, and some desparate mom is trying to change her son's diaper, when all of a sudden she gets hit with a stream of pee in the face.

I like it when you're happily sitting in a toasty warm blanket under an umbrella at the side-lines of your brother's soccer game, while he's all getting soaked playing all hard-core-like in the mud.

I like it when a parent is forced to sit through two hours or something of some girlie kiddie Barbie movie with her daughter when they go to the cinema, and soon after pledge never to do that again.

I like it when a teacher sees that somebody has scribbled all over his/her board, automatically accuse the loud obnoxious student, only to immediately back up on the punishment when he/she finds out that the petite, innocent, quiet girl did it.

I like it when a cat will go and sleep somewhere totally random, and by the looks of it- completely uncomfortable, like on the microwave, in the sink, or on your brothers' scooter.

I like it when adults share this big "inside joke" about something that happened in "their time" and the onlooking teens will be disturbed or weirded out.

I like people who follow my blog.

So now you know what I like.

(I just realized, about half of the things on my list somehow include little kids. :-/ hmmm.)

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