This Coco Juniper post is made to be deliberately like a CNN news broadcast. Tell me how it goes, mmkay?
Coco: Greetings, watchers. Today I am sorry to entitle you to some very grave news. Sky Juniper, mascot and friend to cocojuniper.blogspot.com, is missing. Allow me to switch over to Mr. Darcy, who is reporting from the crime scene. Doctor?
Mr. Darcy: Grave news indeed. Sky has been a beacon of hope to bloggers everywhere, ensuring safe prosperity to CJ Forever. But now, reports are flying everywhere of a tragic accident that has ensured his mishap. Witnesses tell me that Sky, after returning from the zoo, was run over by a minivan. Princess Peach, would you care to explain what you saw?
Princess Peach: Of course. I was only coming back from dress shopping- they just don't sell pink dresses like they used to!- when i hear a SCREECH and a HOWL as Sky the Weasel was squished by the oncoming van.
Mr. Darcy: *alarmed* Squished by a van? How could it be so? Are you to believe that Sky is dead?
Princess Peach: Hmmm. Well. Okay. I always assumed that Sky was strong for a weasel, but even then the chances of survival are slim. Uhm...well then. This is unfortunate. Err...call of the search!
Obi-Wan-Kenobi: *appears out of nowhere*Not so fast!
Mr. Darcy: Obi-Wan-Kenobi! From Star Wars? Aren't you supposed to be dead?!
Obi-Wan-Kenobi: Why yes, yes I am.
Mr. Darcy: *blustering* But, uh, then, uhm, are you, to, here and, then I, and Sky the weasel, and er, the uh search?
Voldermort: *appears out of nowhere* Stop blustering fool!
Mr. Darcy, Princess Peach, Obi-Wan-Kenobi: VOLDERMORT?!?!
Voldermort: It is me! The great, the almighty- VOLDERMORT! Aha!
Princess Peach: What the heck are you doing here?
Voldermort: That is no way to address the Dark Lord. I sentence you to- ETERNAL PAIN!
Princess Peach: Ahhhhhhhhh! *turns into pile of ash*
Mr. Darcy: WHAT is GOING on HERE!
Voldermort: That was no van that smooshed Sky the Weasel! It was I! Voldermort! I wanted to rid of him to curse the world with evil, so I turned Indiana Jones into a red minivan and bribed Ron Weasely into running him down!
Obi-Won-Kenobi: *turns around to look at Ron who, coincidentally, is standing right behind them* How could you, laddie?! You endangered earth, the universe, and Indiana Jones! Where is he anyway?
Ron Weasely: *nervously* I kindof ran him into a stopsign.
Obi-Won-Kenobi: YOU!
Voldermort: *inturrupting* SILENCE! This is about ME, remember? It was MY plan! Stop stealing my spotlight- BE GONE!
Ron Weasely: Ahhhhhhhh! *turns into pile of ash*
Voldermort: Much better.
Princess Peach: *who miraculously is well enough to talk* Can't argue with ya there.
Obi-Won-Kenobi: ENOUGH! This has gone too far! Voldermort, GET OUT OF HERE!
Voldermort: Make me!
Princess Peach: *chants* Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
Obi-Won-Kenobi: the tables are turned. I may have been defeated by my apprentice, but you will never reign over ME!
Voldermort: Harry Potter can believe all he wants. He is no match for I, either. If it's a fight they want, it's a fight you'll get.
Princess Peach: Let the battle between fantasy and sci-fi begin!
Indiana Jones: *who runs over, still in minivan form* STOP!Voldermort: Much better.
Princess Peach: *who miraculously is well enough to talk* Can't argue with ya there.
Obi-Won-Kenobi: ENOUGH! This has gone too far! Voldermort, GET OUT OF HERE!
Voldermort: Make me!
Princess Peach: *chants* Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
Obi-Won-Kenobi: the tables are turned. I may have been defeated by my apprentice, but you will never reign over ME!
Voldermort: Harry Potter can believe all he wants. He is no match for I, either. If it's a fight they want, it's a fight you'll get.
Princess Peach: Let the battle between fantasy and sci-fi begin!
Princess Peach: No! Don't listen to him- he's just a truck!
Indiana Jones: you're one to talk!
Mr. Darcy: What is going on here?!?
Indiana Jones: Don't listen to her! We must not be fighting at times like this. There is something important I need to tell you! Sky the Weasel is still alive!
Mr. Darcy: What?
Princess Peach: What?
Obi-Won-Kenobi: What?
Ron Weasely: What?
Voldermort: What! No!
Indiana Jones: It's true! That was not him I ran over, he is still alive!
Princess Peach: Hooray!
Voldermort: Silence! *blasts her again with his wand.*
Princess Peach: Ahhhhhh! *disappears completely*
Mr. Darcy: But if you didn't run over Sky, who did you?
R2D2: *wheels by- battered and broken* *mournfully* beep!
Voldermort: That's no fair! You have another Star Wars character! I'm outnumbered! *waves want- Hermione Granger appears* Now it's a fair fight!
Ron Weasely: But you had me, remember?
Voldermort: Don't make me hurt you.
Indiana Jones: THERE IS NO FIGHT! This is about SKY, remember?!?!?!?!?!
Princess Peach: *now only consisting as a disattatched voice* Go find him, you dolts!
Voldermort: HOW DOES SHE KEEP COMING BACK?!?!
Obi-Won-Kenobi: She's right! R2-D2, you're with me! We have to find him before he does!
Voldermort: No problem! Hermione!
Hermione: No! I'm not working for you!
Voldermort: Here's five dollars.
Hermione: I'm all yours.
Obi-Won-Kenobi: Onward!
Voldermort: Raaaaaaah!
Indiana Jones: *after a long pause* I mean, I know I'm a car, but do you still think I can take Willie to the prom?
Mr. Darcy: ...
Princess Peach: ...
Ron Weasely: Sure!
Will Voldermort find Sky and destroy him before Obi-Won-Kenobi can save him? Will Princess Peach, Ron Weasely, and Indiana Jones ever be restored to their original form? Who is better- fantasy or sci-fi? Tune in next "week"! Bye!
6 comments:
Le sigh...
I was bored.
I know, I know, but i promise bttr posts on the way, 'kay?
cocO!!! i loved your post! voldemort! haha! whoo! best blog yet! you rule girl! you know what on award day i'm giving you a award for funnisest blog!
awesome i heart it!!!!!! GO PRINCESS PEACH!! "ur like a cockroach. Like a cockroach" ~Jay, project runway, season 1! he he random quote, but soooo appropriate for princess peach!
hahaha, Project Runway. Didn't it just end season 4/5? I liked Cristian- the short guy with the foreign haircut, glasses, and funny voice, who made the famous feathery dress. ^_^ yay! we'll always remember him. Nobody's as interesting as him in season 4/5. i know there's this wacko lady who keeps pounding on her leatha- Stella. And, then this 50s dress girl- Kennedy- who laffs a lot and backtalks the judges (rock on Kennedy!!!!) and then a woman with a 'fro.
I should totally be a judge for Project Runway. DIDJA HEAR DAT TIM GUNN?!?!?!? HEIDI?!?!?!?!!? YEAH, IM RIGHT HERE! CALL ME!!!!
omg u watch it too? i only saw the last two or three episodes... but i rented season one and we're getting season two 2day!!!! YAY! i remeber stella she was... well Kennedey was a brat she always backtalked! its like,seriously!
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